Who Am I Without You – Episode 15 (Finale)
The event of yesterday was still fresh in my head as I got dressed to join my mother yet again in the hospital. After she fainted, Bolu took me home to get Dare and we spent the night at his place. I wasn’t too happy with the arrangement. I felt it was too soon to start sleeping over especially with my son along but I couldn’t stay alone with Dare in our house that night. I tried to sleep because I needed to be up again to visit them but I just couldn’t close my eyes the whole night. I had so many thoughts running through my head. I was still unable to get over the fact that my mother thought at first that I had a hand in whatever was wrong with Kate. Above all, I felt like a burden to Bolu the whole day. He had a business meeting that he was heading too before I called him for help. When I asked him about it later, he said his secretary will reschedule the meeting; I felt more at ease. I had gotten Dare’s school uniform on our way to Bolu’s place. I dressed him up this morning and we were ready to go out when Ada, Bolu’s house help called out to me.
“Madam, Oga told me to make you something this morning that you will be going to the hospital, also I made something for junior too.” she smiled down at Dare. I couldn’t form words to thank her. I grabbed the food and gave the girl a big hug.
“Dare, hurry up and eat.” I didn’t bother to ask about Bolu because I knew his schedule already by now.
2 hours later, I was at the hospital. “Hello Lola.” A familiar voice called out to me. I turned around and it was Bolu; my Ex. At first I looked around to see if anyone was with him because I saw no reason why he would be here at this moment. My first guess was maybe his wife was in labor. I felt a big blow of jealousy hit me. I could almost taste the bittlerness in my mouth.
“Wipe that look off your face, it doesn’t fit you.” He said as he walked closer.
“What are you doing here?” I asked wearily.
“Your mother asked me to come.” He answered.
“And why would she do that?” I was confused.
“Stop asking me silly questions, isn’t it obvious why I am here?” He asked. “I don’t think your Mr. Obafemi is as generous as people claim he is if not your mother would not have called me begging for me to help her fund Kate’s hospital bills.”
Oh no she didn’t! As if what he just said didn’t faze me, I said to him,“Oh okay, thank you but I will take it from here; you can go back to your busy life.” I was boiling on the inside, and about walking out on him when he said,
“Lola, how could you not have been this smart?” I turned around and asked him what he meant by that.
“Meaning?” I asked.
“I wouldn’t have minded if you brought up the idea of abortion when you got pregnant with Dare. We wouldn’t have been stuck in this position if you had done something faster.” He said. I didn’t know I had this much anger in me. I didn’t know how or when I landed him a dirty slap right there in front of some of the visitors walking past.
“How dare you?” I asked him. How could he talk about having Dare aborted? Did he never want the child?
“Lola, you dare raise your hand to slap me?” he asked.
“And I would do it again without giving it a second thought.” I said to him. He started to use his hands to soothe his jaw.
“I see your new boyfriend has turned you into something else. Lola, you raised your filthy hands to slap me?” He was raising his voice at me, still in doubt. Although my feet were shaking, I could not back out now.
“And I would do it again!”
“Come ooh, who the hell do you think you are? Do you understand the rubbish you just said?” I asked him as I shoved my fingers straight at his face. My mother instincts kicked in.
“How will I ever explain to your son that his father never wanted him?” he stood looking at me as if he didn’t care for what I was saying. I felt so helpless since his true feelings about our son was finally known to me. Did he only stay with me all these years just to save his own face and pride?
“It’s clear to me that your sister Kate might be the only sane person in your family. She knew what she had to do………” I couldn’t help it, I slapped him again. This time I made sure it really echoed in my own ears. The nurses began to pay more attention to what was going on with us. They began to panic because they all saw the anger in Bolu’s eyes that I ignored.
“Don’t ever open your mouth to talk about my sister or my family!” I yelled.
“I can see you are really allowing the devil to use you.” I said to him. One of the nurses who had the courage to come forward was pleading with me to calm down before security would be called.
“Leave me let me talk to this bastard.” I yelled at the nurses as they tried to talk me out of the mess.
“Lola we are not through! Come back here!” he said as I walked away.
“Oh we have been through for the longest!” I screamed back at him. “Shameless man!” I hissed.
“What’s all that commotion I heard about?” my mother asked me as I opened the door to Kate’s hospital room. “Mama you called Bolu?” I descended on her.
“You didn’t even ask about the man who drove us here, he was the one who saved Kate’s life not Bolu!” I yelled. This time, I wasn’t going to allow her mention a word.
“Mama for common 20 thousand naira, you sold me out again to him.” I couldn’t hold my tears in.
“Did I say we couldn’t afford it? What’s your business with Bolu ehn? Mama tell me na, what’s our business with him?”
“What has come over you? Do you realize am still your mother?” she asked.
“Well it’s time you start acting like one!” I refused to let her have this moment. It was seriously time for us to let everything out.
“I am so so sick and tired of you trying to control me! What am I to you?”
“You want to beat me abi?” she asked. “Come and beat me ooh since you have grown larger wings than I.” we were both having our shot at it back and forth.
“Why are my feelings always the last thing you think about?”
“Why mama? Why do you hate me so much?” I asked pacing around the little hospital room.
“Why won’t I hate you after you encouraged my only child to take abortion pills that almost took her life?” that halted my movement. As if she had gave out a secret she quickly drew closer to me and held my hands.
“Wait, did I just hear you say only child?” I asked. What the hell was going on? She used her hands to cover my mouth, preventing me from finishing my words.
“Mom! Did you seriously just refer to Kate as your only child?” I asked again. This time she was shaking, she couldn’t speak.
“Lola, it was a………slip……of the tongue.” She managed to lie. She was pacing around as if she knew something that I didn’t. She removed her head tie and used it to tie her waist.
“I am finished” she kept saying.
“Mom, you’re going to tell me why a mother would ever experience a slip of the tongue when it comes to her own children.”
“Lola, really this is nothing okay? Let’s Just forget it ever happened and not wake up your sister.” She pleaded with me. The look she saw on my face gave away my answer.
“Talk!” I yelled.