Keep It Simple: How to Be a Better Kisser
When good lovers are ba d kissers
In my younger days, one of my boyfriends was an awful kisser. I mean, he thought his tongue was supposed to reside in my mouth like a hermit crab finding a shell. I even said something to him once and tried to teach him how to go soft and slow. It didn’t work out so well.
Of course, we’ve all come kiss to kiss with someone that isn’t the greatest at making out, but good or bad, kissing reveals a lot. Sometimes by kissing you can if there are true sparks between you and someone. Sometimes you meet someone awesome and can’t want to kiss, only to be disappointed in their style… and that could be a deal breaker for some people. Sometimes an amazing kisser will be amazing in bed.
Kissing is something a lot of people forget about. We spend a lot time trying to master other things, like oral or various positions that a lot of us forget how important (and arousing) a simple kissing sesh can be to our relationships.
I don’t know who taught certain people that they should start all kisses with their tongue out and pointing towards the other person. Gently touch lips with your mouth slightly open. Make it a point to concentrate on how their lips feel on yours before things get hotter and heavier and you turn it up to eleven.
Sometimes the point is to enjoy the kissing for itself, it’s not always just a means to an end.
Occasionally open your eyes. It’s an awkward position to be able to focus on their face, but it’s an amazing feeling if they have their eyes open too. It’s like deep eye-contact during intercourse — you make a connection. It’s more of a turn on and helps your relationship emotionally.
A few seconds of looking into their eyes is all I need, but everyone is different. Some people keep their eyes open the entire time they make-out. If two of these types of folks hookup, does it become a staring contest?
Don’t try to “lead,” like my ex did. If you want more intensity (more tongue, firmer, deeper face mashing), then work your way up to it. Not everyone is into super agressive kissing, especially off the bat.
However, on the flip-side, you may find yourself with a dom who does want to take control. If you like it, go with it! If it’s not your thing, back away a little. If they don’t get the hint then just STOP. You have every right to pull away for any reason.
Like the time I was making out with a guy during a first date and he slapped me across the face without my consent. If your partner does that…. GTFO. Actually, that happened again with another guy a few years later…
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